Sunday, June 24, 2012

Story Lengths

I really hate guidelines.  I've hated guidelines as far as I could remember.  I always colored outside the lines, I wore my t-shirts inside-out, I never stayed on the sidewalk, and I turned my homework in 2 days past due.  I noticed that my fellow writing peers love guidelines because they were the ones who did their homework, maintained neatly shaded-in coloring books and took pride in being the teacher's pet and following unnecessary guidelines.  In other words, most of them never learned how to think for themselves.

Once in a while, someone like myself who enters through the backdoor.  Most times, I kick in the front door when I grow tired of that big musclehead asshole telling me no and crash the party and piss a few people off in the process because I choose not to play nice and go along with bullshit to get along,118263.0.html  Oh well, I stopped giving a fuck about people's unspoken guidelines long before my first one-star review, but once in a while guidelines are vital.  So I've taken the liberty to share some of my guidelines after having browsed websites with 10 different story formats. SHIT!

Speaking of which, I really fucking hate the word novelette.  It confuses people outside of the writing community, readers in most instances don't know what the fuck I'm talking about, and it doesn't roll off my tongue well.  Novellette --what the fuck is a novelette?  Is novella the tall blonde and novelette the short brunette?  Fuck if I know, nor do I give a shit.  Because I hate the word novelette I'm not going to use it.  Here's a list of three basic story formats that I adhere to when writing and publishing stories:

Short Stories - 5000 words or less (20 pages or less)  $2.99 ebook, no print

Novellas - 7000 - 25000 words ( 28 - 100  pages) $3.99 - $4.99 ebook,
$9.99 paperback *at least 20,000 words if I have it in print.

Novels - 40,000 words or more ( 160 pages or more) $7.99 - $9.99 ebook,
$15.99 - $19.99 paperback

Really fucking simple there, right? 

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